I attended the memorial service of my mom in Quanzhou Honglai church last Thursday (Aug 11). The service was actually originally planned for her 2nd and 3rd brother. With my mom’s demise, it became the 3 of them together. Seeing all 3 siblings’ photos side by side in the hall that held the memorial service did make me feel bitter and sad.
As my uncle 2’s only daughter in USA (San Fransisco) was not able to take leave to attend the service, the eulogy for him originally written by my mom was delivered by my eldest male cousin Andrew, as he felt that it was the perfect occasion to know how my mom was so heartbroken after her elder brother passed on.
My UK uncle 3’s eulogy was delivered by his eldest son Wu Yao Tsan. He prepared it the last minute on his iPad, so I had to deliver the eulogy of my mom prior to him. As Yao Tsan was not so fluent in Chinese and got limited Chinese vocabulary, his speech was delivered in English; and my New York cousin Nancy translated it for him into Mandarin.
Luckily, I was able to control my emotions during the delivering of the eulogy of my mom. I did cry briefly prior to it, and managed to compose myself during the speech; and cried again briefly towards the end of the service. At first, my husband Richard is kind of concerned that I had to deliver the eulogy, as in his views, it took me long time and great effort to get out of the grief shadow; and he is afraid that upon delivering the eulogy, I will walk straight into it again. However, this is something I have to overcome myself. Even if I did not deliver it this time, I still have to deliver it some other time. So it is better that I get it done with sooner rather than later.
Upon delivering the speech, I am so proud of myself, as I know that with God’s guidance, I am strong enough to overcome any obstacles that I am facing. And this is definitely a big breakthrough in my life too.